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Posted by admin
169 days ago
under Contemplative Fire
As the Christmas season builds up around us, I invite you to consider the thoughts of Meister Eckhart from the 13th century......
Only that activity that is done from the ground of the Soul will have truly lasting and positive effects, because it is not done then by me but by God, and is permeated by God's wisdom and power. So if we want to be good and useful members of society, of community, it is very important that we enter the depths of ourselves, discover God in our souls ground, and learn to act from that centre.
And so 700 years later, in Contemplative Fire we seek to help each other, slow down, listen to Gods's presence within us and then live out of what we know from the depth of our being. Only that will be lasting. Eternal. Let us encourage one another to live eternal lives.
May God's LIFE be alive within you as you celebrate Christmas
Posted by admin
199 days ago
under Contemplative Fire
Staying the course. Getting where we’re meant to be. Here I stand.
A month ago I read a story about a man who was given by God, a wagon with three stones. He was to take the load up to the top of the hill, but on route he kept acquiring other people's rocks, stones and pebbles. Eventually he was laden down, miserable, tired and angry at God for giving him too much to do. God re-appeared and looked in the wagon finding much more than the original three stones he'd been given. "Would you be content to let others carry their own stones and you keep focused on the task I give you?"
I paused. When I first read the story I experienced a simple rest, a laying down of something that had slipped into my wagon. I enjoyed the pause, the scenery. I enjoyed knowing God.
Have you taken on more than God has given you?
It's easy for me to write that question but I know it is a challenge for many of us, myself included. Although challenging I believe it is a key question, not just for the quality of our own lives, but for the shaping of both our immediate and global community. We matter. Our choices matter. We need to keep focused on God and what we are given to do. If we miss our movement in the global dance the whole chain is altered. We need to know our place to stand, and then stand there. The view will be great.
Do you know your stones and your wagon?
with much love and prayers as we journey together
Anne
Posted by admin
199 days ago
under Contemplative Fire
Staying the course. Getting where we’re meant to be. Here I stand.
A month ago I read a story about a man who was given by God, a wagon with three stones. He was to take the load up to the top of the hill, but on route he kept acquiring other people's rocks, stones and pebbles. Eventually he was laden down, miserable, tired and angry at God for giving him too much to do. God re-appeared and looked in the wagon finding much more than the original three stones he'd been given. "Would you be content to let others carry their own stones and you keep focused on the task I give you?"
I paused. When I first read the story I experienced a simple rest, a laying down of something that had slipped into my wagon. I enjoyed the pause, the scenery. I enjoyed knowing God.
Have you taken on more than God has given you?
It's easy for me to write that question but I know it is a challenge for many of us, myself included. Although challenging I believe it is a key question, not just for the quality of our own lives, but for the shaping of both our immediate and global community. We matter. Our choices matter. We need to keep focused on God and what we are given to do. If we miss our movement in the global dance the whole chain is altered. We need to know our place to stand, and then stand there. The view will be great.
Do you know your stones and your wagon?
with much love and prayers as we journey together
Posted by admin
230 days ago
under Contemplative Fire
Photo Courtesy of Rebecca Crosthwait
Are you ever aware of hidden parts of your life?
I took a quiet day this week and began by sitting on a rock by a lake watching the waves ebb and flow.
I took time to arrive into a quieter space. Time to leave behind what I carried from my city life -leaving interior conversations, leaving memories of what had been, leaving wonderings of the future.
I simply sat, being with water sounds - aware of the depth of the lake and waves that ebb and flow. As I watched water move with ebb and flow I realized that it was also shaped by what was below. There was a rock hidden from sight that altered the simple ebb and flow of the waves.
I was reminded that in life, my days ebb and flow and often my movements or reactions are also shaped by a hidden presence, something from my past that hides under the surface.
In my years in contemplative practice I have often encountered such hidden rocks. When I sit quietly I discover there is anything BUT quietness within myself. The bed of my lake is full of rocks that alter the gentle flow of God's still presence. This is a common awareness amongst those who have cultivated a contemplative practice.
We can run from that which is under the waves, or we can be present to it, welcome it and offer it to God who is more than able to wash over it, even to move it away.
I realized this week that God was at work within me doing just that, removing one of the rocks hidden within me. My interior world was shifting. It was a bit lighter and more spacious.
God is ever at work. Are you attentive to the movement of the Spirit? Is there something under the water that God is drawing to your attention? Some old way, habit, attitude, pattern that you no longer need?
May you know the movement of God's Spirit in the hidden places of your life and experience the wash of holy waves upon you.
Love and prayers
Anne
The Revd Anne Crosthwait
Community Leader (Canada)
Posted by admin
249 days ago
under Contemplative Fire
September 2011 Reflection
Yesterday that age old expression took on a whole new meaning for me.
A forest isn't built in a day either. In July while with Contemplative Fire folk in the UK, we walked in the woods behind their home and four of us encircled an oak tree. It was so large that four adults with their arms outstretched could just cover it's circumference. Now that's a tree! Imagine what it has seen for it must be hundreds of years old. It didn't grow in a day either.
Why do I insist on thinking whatever I'm engaged in must be done immediately if not yesterday?
Literally yesterday, I turned the page in an art book I keep in the kitchen. 365 works of art, each with a thought/quote. That's when I found an etching by Piranesi of the Veduta of Rome paired with the quote. I delight in seeing how the Spirit can use anything to teach me for as soon as I saw the picture and read the wisdom I recognized an internal shift to slow me down. What am I rushing about? I want decisions. I want clarity. I want potentiality and possibilities to be realities. I want an acorn to be an oak tree and a piece of stone to be a city.
I still don't have a 'To Do' list, but I am feeling the force of activity in the world around me and my own vulnerability to it's press of speed, achievement, accomplishment. I remain committed to honoring 'being' above 'doing'. keeping my 'doing' submitted to Being, to Love, to God.
Contemplative Fire in Canada is going through a time of change and transition. I want it done now. I want the acorn to be an oak tree. The rest of my life is also experiencing change and possibilities. I want to see it now. I want the piece of stone to be a city.
I discover one more level of impatience in my false self, one more source of the strivings of the false self from which I seek freedom.
How about you? -- Any acorns you're pushing into oak trees? Any stones you're frustrated with because they're not yet a city? Or any acorns you're trying to make into maple trees or tulips?
Maybe it's time to reaffirm your intent to live resting in the LOVE of God, being held, sustained, floating in Presence right here, right now.
I'm always happy to hear from you.
with prayers as we continue this journey together
Anne
The Revd Anne Crosthwait
Community Leader (Canada)
Posted by admin
266 days ago
under Contemplative Fire
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July 2011 Reflection
Do you have a "To Do" list?
How long is it? Do you ever add things to it when you've already done them so you can cross them off? I've done that! Does your list ever feel like it has a life of it's own, growing so large, even driving your life?
I can't recall when I haven't had a 'To Do' list or even lists. But right now I don't have one. Honestly, I don't have one.
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Leaf-in-the-Wind
The wind blows where it will...
Ever since last March I've felt drawn to explore more deeply what Jesus meant when he said his people were to live blown freely by the Spirit, leaf-in-the-wind kind of people. How does that fit into my North Amerian, schedule driven life? Or does it? Maybe this 'leaf-in-the-wind' life is actually a part of Contemplative Fire's vision of creating a community of Christ at the edge.
I've just returned from an extended summer break where I had what first felt like a challenge but then became a privledge. I didn't have anything to do. I was supposed to care for my grandchildren, but at the last minute that switched and my care was only needed sporadically. I could visit and play most days, but I wasn't needed to work. No one needed me. There was nothing to justify my existence beyond my presence. There was no "To Do" List.
Here was an opportunity to live Leaf-in-the-Wind. To decide each day what I would do. To decide each hour, each step. To explore the inner rhythms of my body, heart, mind and spirit to know the next 'right thing to do'. What started as a challenge became a joy.
I experienced the difference between been driven in life, driven by 'To Do' lists, by my own or others expectations, and a life of following the inner voice, the gentle rhythm of my heart. Some days I was amazed at how much happened. Some days I was amazed at how little happened but how much was experienced.
Leaf-in-the-Wind - to be led by the Spirit of God into what might appear as random acts, but are actually moved by the deep eternal Spirit. I'd like to live a life where I follow Jesus more closely. Maybe Jesus is calling me/us into a radically different way of life, one deeply dependent upon him. Maybe this is a part of creating a community of Christ at the edge.
I'm back to work now. Will I start a "To Do" List again? I don't know. If i do, can I manage it so that it doesn't drive me, but merely supports me, a tool not a motor. I do know I want to learn to follow Christ's Spirit more deeply in my life. I want to know his wind blowing through me. I'm not sure where he will carry me, but I do trust more and more in the adventure of being loved by him.
How is your life today? Would you describe it driven by pressures, or more led by presence? Or would you have other words?
As always, I'm pleased to receive your reflections in response to mine.
with love and prayers as we journey together.
Anne
The Revd Anne Crosthwait
Community Leader (Canada)
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Posted by admin
291 days ago
under Contemplative Fire
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Posted by admin
352 days ago
under Contemplative Fire
June 2011 Reflection
Trusting all is well, I'm probably playing with my grandchildren as you read this reflection! I've been gifted with a month of playing, spontaneity, wonder, discovery, messy meals, slow walks and squabbles. I'm seeing the world through the eyes of a three year old and the hands of a crawling baby.
"Leaf in the wind" has been a phrase I heard this winter from Jesus' description of life in the Spirit. The wind blows where it will and we hear the sound of it, but we do not know where it comes or where it goes. So it is with the life of the spirit. I heard the invitation to live as 'leaf in the wind'. Lightly. Gently. Moved by the Spirit. Not moved by the host of drives, compulsions and needs and agendas that reside within me.
'Leaf in the wind' has some similarity to being a child. I'm indebted to Wayne Muller for drawing them together for me. Here is an extended quote from A Life of Being, Having, and Doing Enough :
"Unless you become as a child, said Jesus, you shall not enter the kingdom of heaven. He is describing a quality of mind natural to a growing child, this curious beginner's mind, where by retaining our capacity for wonder, surprise, and delgiht, we come closer to that state of grace where we are able to find God's presence almost anywhere.
But if we let go of our corrosive, mistaken presumption that we are somehow responsible to supervise the work of God and instead allow ourselvse to be humbly and easily used by God, we soon become more supple, able to bend gently, easily to forces much larger and wiser than ourselves, and taste each new surprise as an opportuntiy, a blessing, a delight. Then the manfiicently impossible kingdom of heaven is ours."
May you relax and play well my friends, being leaf in the wind of God's Love and finding God's Presence right where you are.
love and prayers
Anne
Posted by admin
383 days ago
under Contemplative Fire
May 2011 Reflection
'We're not meant to walk alone." I read this in an article a friend wrote the other day and it touched a cord within me. In Contemplative Fire we have 'Companions on the Way'. For centuries there have been pilgrims who joined together on a sacred journey. Jesus invites us to follow him. I know we aren't meant to walk alone, but sometimes questions, doubts, faith problems have caused me to be separate from other believers.
My wonderings have led me to wandering. Has this ever happened to you?
I recalled last week how, when in dry period spiritually that lasted many years, I stopped connecting with other believers. It was just too hard. There was nothing to share. I didn't want or bother to tell anyone about my doubts, questions, or the empty silence I knew. In fact I became so used to it, I didn't even think it was strange any more. Not till one day, in a ballpark watching my girls play baseball I mentioned the empty silence to a friend. Suddenly that silence felt so real. The frustrations that were part of it became so vocal. I yearned for an end to it. If only, one more time, God could make sense to me, be real to me.
We all have times of wonderings. If you, or someone you know, is currently in such a space, my prayers are that you will not wander, but seek someone you know who can hold the light of faith for you during this time of dryness, or questioning, or doubting.
We are not meant to walk alone.
Contemplative Fire is a community made to provide space for wonderings, for questions, for wrestling with theological issues. Come and join us at our Gatherings and in our small groups. Share your wonderings. You do not need to walk alone.
with love and prayers
Anne
The Revd Anne Crosthwait
Community Leader (Canada)
Posted by admin
413 days ago
under Contemplative Fire
April 2011 Reflection
I was supposed to choose from all the drawings I'd done during the term and bring in a picture to show in the open house that the art school was having later in the month. I looked over all my drawings - charcoal, ink, pastels, gesture drawings, self-portraits, life drawings, feathers and buildings. There were lots to choose from.
Then I realized that none of them were finished.
I've been taking a basic drawing class to learn - well, the basics, and we'd tried lots of different techniques. The purpose was never to make a finished work but to experiment, be playful, learn to see.
But now - how could I bring in something, offer it to go on a wall for others to see, with my name on it, when it wasn't finished. I was being asked to put my unfinished work up for everyone to look at. I suddenly felt rather naked, exposed.
Unfinished Art
But then something began to stir within me. It really wasn't about the art at all. My sense of exposure had nothing to do with art or my drawing ability but everything to do with my innate perfectionism that is never satisfied, that finds it so hard to say 'good job', or 'well done' because some tiny thing might be out of place. Oh how I dislike that part of me!
Maybe I was being given an opportunity to love a part of myself I'm not fond of - to accept my perfectionism and just let it be.
In an instant I realized it wasn't just my art work that was unfinished, I was too. And yet I know I'm lovely in my unfinished, potential being. I know I am Beloved, just as I am.
Unfinished Art
Do you struggle with perfectionism like I do?
What is it like to see yourself as a piece of art -- beautiful and still unfinished?
Do you know you too are called 'Beloved' by God?
You and me, we are Unfinished Art, not discarded or set aside, simply still unfinished, still being shaped and formed, holding all the potential of life within us, being all that there is to be right now and we are beautiful. Unfinished and finished all in the same breath!
with love and prayers as we continue moving towards Easter
Anne
The Revd Anne Crosthwait
Community Leader (Canada)
Contemplative Fire
Posted by admin
444 days ago
under Contemplative Fire
March 2011 Reflection
has appeared out of the 'PLAYFULNESS' of last month.
"The wind blows wherever it pleases.
You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going.
So it is with everyone born of the Spirit." John, a friend of Jesus, recalls his words to an inquirer
I remember the first time i 'heard' those words. It was so long ago. I was in my early twenties, newly alive with the Spirit's movement within me. Instinctively I loved the freedom, unpredictability, spontaneity, and freshness of God's presence and life.
And now I wonder if I'm 'spontaneously' challenged! in those years I packed my small bag and moved around whenever I liked, perhaps avoiding responsibility and relationships, but perhaps too following what I knew then as the deepest movement of my heart. It took me into a discovery of Jesus and God's deep love for me, despite how I presented myself to and in the world. Maybe there is something to be said for a spontaneous life!
When I read Jesus' story I experience him as deeply grounded, but ever so spontaneous. He was not held by others expectations or a three year ministry strategy. He was moved by what he heard from God in prayer, through study and through people. Being. Knowing. Doing. All held together by the Mystery of God
'Playfulness', last month's reflection, drew more responses than ever before. From regular responders, from people who peek into Contemplative Fire occasionally, from inquirers, from someone I was doing business with who checked out our website -- such a strong response of YES - we need play. It felt like we are hungry for it. One wrote how she recognized that her prayer had turned into work for her! Does your spiritual life or spiritual seeking feel like work to you?
The Jesus Way, is a way that is fresh, free, spontaneous, a way that senses the movement of the Spirit blowing free as the wind, while deeply rooted in an historical faith expression. It is new wine that needs a new wineskin. Contemplative Fire seeks to embody that delightful paradox of depth and movement, of groundedness and freedom.
As followers of Jesus, are we growing, living into his spontaneity?
Do we trust God's Presence within us?
 
Help me to trust you as you throw me into the air.
Help me to trust you as you hold me close to your heart.
Spontaneous.....
Do you step away from this word or draw close to it?
How spontaneous has been your day?
When did you last sense of movement of the Spirit and turn to follow?
Will you join me in bringing more playfulness and spontaneity into our world?
with love and prayers
Anne
The Revd Anne Crosthwait
Community Leader (Canada)
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